Bold and Beautiful

Dear people,

It is said that in Solomon Islands, people do not cut down any unwanted tree. Instead they gather around it and ruthlessly curse and abuse it. Slowly, the tree withers away on its own. In much simpler form, poisonous words can destroy even the brave-hearted. Words can make or break a heart.

The feeling is no less when you’re being body shamed for how you look. How do I know? That’s not important. We can always, to an extent, deal with strangers body-shaming us or saying not so nice things about us. Because we understand that they would always have to say something or the other when we meet. But it hits us when people we call family, would do it. Maybe you cannot always call it “body-shaming”, but definitely somewhere close. People can actually be comfortable about how they look until every time someone has to ask why they have to look that way. People suddenly feel uncomfortable standing in their own shoes. Then you feel yourself slowly breaking, the merriness fading away, and your anxiety kicks in.

If it is highly necessary for people to always comment negatively on how others look, then I understand. But, for a minute if you could just stop and think the harm you do to a person when you call them too fat, too skinny or ugly, you’ll feel bad about your own self. And most truthfully, if you could ever just put yourself in the shoes of those you body-shame, you wouldn’t last a minute. See the damage is done when you will body-shame someone, and the 0.01% motivation they have will also disappear. Sometimes people don’t always look the way they are because they prefer to be that way. It could be because they are trying each and everything to have that perfect body we all want, but are unable to. It could be because they are suffering from some illness which causes them to look the way they are that you are unaware about. Or it could be simply because they are comfortable being that way but people will always have to say something negative and drag them down.

For once, if we can be nice to other people and actually make them feel good about themselves rather than making them feel uneasy, we will see more happiness than we’ve ever seen in this world. It is very important to care for other people, it has the power of curing within it, and it is the medicine which eliminates pain. There is a ruthless competitive world outside, and in this world everyone wants to be a part of a never ending rat race.

Just to remind, a harsh slap will never have the same effect a harsh compliment has. Every person has their own speciality, their own potential, their own likings. If you can’t respect another person’s feelings, at least try not to bad-mouth about them. That is eventually, the least you can do to help another live a better life. Whatever we think is right we believe is proper. Whatever we don’t think is right, we believe is improper. But sometimes, whatever we feel is right, might not always be right. And whatever we believed isn’t right, maybe is after all what is right. Let us be a little kinder tomorrow than we were today.

~ Gavini Yapa